Do you remember Alanis Morissette? Y’know, Alanis Morissette? The singer? Canadian, I think. You know, the one with the long hair over her boobs?
Yes, her. If you’re a child of the 80s and 90s, like I am, you may remember Alanis. I do, didn’t really care much for her myself, she kind of blurred in with all the other singers like her, such as Sheryl Crow and Shania Twain (phwoar).
Anyway, one thing has griped me about Alanis’ song ‘Ironic’ for years: absolutely nothing in the song is ironic. It’s plain bad luck. Let’s take a look, shall we?
An old man, turned ninety-eight; he won the lottery, and died the next day - BAD LUCK.
It’s a black fly in your Chardonnay - BAD LUCK.
A traffic jam when you’re already late - again, BAD LUCK, but to be expected in the UK
I could go on. The song should have been renamed ‘Bad Luck’. But anyway, it doesn’t really matter. Just had to get it off my chest.
And now, just to annoy you:
You are now aware that your nose is constantly in your peripheral vision.
You now have an irresistible urge to swallow.