Five stars, of course

Dear reader,

You look incredible today. Has anyone ever told you that? And you smell great, really lovely. What do you mean, it’s your natural scent? Wow. Look at your bum, it looks amazing in those jeans. I could just reach out and pinch it.

And you, lady. You look almost as good as your fella, with your great figure and shimmering hair. C’mere, gimme a hug. You’ve got a bit of baby sick on your shoulder. Thanks for that. Still, you look great. Forgive me if I lick your cheek.

What do you mean, ‘what do I want’? Can’t a guy just give a compliment? In this day and age, can’t I jus- OK, you’ve seen right through me, I need your help.

As you know, when you’re trying to sell books, reviews are everything. They can make or break a book’s success. At the moment both of my books have five star reviews, but I could do with more nice things being said in order to keep up momentum.

So, here’s the thing: if you’ve read and enjoyed ‘Goodbye, Pert Breasts’ and/or ‘Teething Pains’, please could you leave a nice review? If you do, I’ll give you that hug. And maybe more. Promise.

About these ads

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s