So, you may have gathered through my incessant Tweeting and Facebook pimping that ‘Goodbye, Pert Breasts’ is out now as a book, packed full of hilarious observations on pregnancy and great advice for dads! Which is why you should buy it. In the meantime, I’ve been working hard on marketing, and am waiting on a [...]
Posts Tagged ‘dad’
The Story So Far…
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged babies, baby, book, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, foetus, funny, humour, parenthood, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant, publishing on September 23, 2010 | 2 Comments »
Week Thirty Seven: Not that I ever massage children, mind you…
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged babies, baby, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, first trimester, foetus, funny, humour, mum, mums, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant on September 17, 2010 | 5 Comments »
Mental note: apparently, “Sucks to be you” is not an acceptable response after your mrs grumbles about how uncomfortable she is. You may feel I’m being harsh, and I probably am; but I’ve been massaging her feet for about fifteen minutes now, and they’re so large it’s akin to rubbing suncream into a child’s back. [...]
*Fanfare, trumpets, etc*
Posted in fatherhood, funny, parenting, pregnancy, tagged babies, baby, book, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, funny, humour, mum, mums, parenthood, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant on September 10, 2010 | 15 Comments »
Today’s the day! ‘Goodbye, Pert Breasts: The Diary of a Newborn Dad’ is now officially released! I would smash a bottle of champagne against the side of my laptop like they do when launching ships, but it’d just get incredibly messy and totally not worth it. The book is now available to purchase via Lulu, [...]
Week Thirty Six: Houston, we are engaged and ready for launch
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged babies, baby, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, fetus, foetus, humour, mums, parenthood, pregnancy, pregnant on September 10, 2010 | 1 Comment »
This week began by a trip to the hospital. Jess’ hands and feet had swelled so much her toes looked like they warranted their own biceps, and as well as this she was feeling really ill. I rang the local hospital for advice, and they told us to go down to get it checked out, [...]
Week Thirty Five: Public Enemy No.1
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged babies, baby, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, funny, humour, mums, parenthood, pregnancy, pregnant on September 3, 2010 | 2 Comments »
Jess is actually beginning to resent me a bit. I know! Me, of all people! I’ve been nothing but charming. It’s because she wants to be skinny and fit. I’m neither, having recently grown a second chin and often hyperventilating during the walk from the house to my car; but I’m still skinnier and fitter [...]
Lend me your ears…
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged babies, baby, book, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, funny, humour, mums, parenthood, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant on August 31, 2010 | 6 Comments »
I come bearing good news, like a payslip or page 3 of The Sun. ‘Goodbye, Pert Breasts’ is going to be published as a book! OK, so no agents wanted me. Publishers gave me the whole “talk to the hand, ‘cos the face ain’t listening” thing. So I’m going to do it the hard way, [...]
Week Thirty Four: If you ask me that question one more time…
Posted in fatherhood, funny, parenting, pregnancy, tagged babies, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, foetus, funny, humour, mum, mums, parenthood, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant on August 27, 2010 | 4 Comments »
“So how long have you got left?” “Are you sure there’s not two in there? They hide behind each other on scans, you know.” (Upon hearing the response to the first question, with a look of polite shock as they regard the sheer size of your partner): “Oh…wow…” Rough translation: Man, you’re huge. There may [...]
Week Thirty Three: I’ll fetch the oil
Posted in fatherhood, parenting, pregnancy, tagged babies, baby, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, fetus, foetus, funny, humour, mums, parenthood, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant on August 20, 2010 | 4 Comments »
Jess had a midwife appointment this week, in which – after much very painful looking pinching and groping – the midwife told her that our baby had got his act together, done a triple somersault double pike, turned upside down and was beginning to engage (which conjures up images of either a capsule docking with [...]
Week Thirty Two: “He just slipped out…honest.”
Posted in fatherhood, funny, parenting, pregnancy, tagged babies, baby, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, fetus, first trimester, foetus, funny, humour, mums, parenthood, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant, trimester on August 13, 2010 | 2 Comments »
This week we attended an antenatal home birth class down at some Quaker centre in the local town. Jess had concerns about being the largest pregnant woman there, and rightly so. She’s swelled somewhat lately. Was it a helpful class? Kinda. Was it full of hippies? Umm, yeah. We began by all sitting in a [...]
Week Thirty One: Break out the earplugs, it’s going to get loud
Posted in fatherhood, funny, parenting, pregnancy, tagged babies, baby, childbirth, dad, dads, early pregnancy, expectant parents, fatherhood, foetus, funny, humour, midwife, mums, parenthood, parenting, pregnancy, pregnant, trimester on August 6, 2010 | 5 Comments »
I made the mistake the other day of watching a television programme in which they showed childbirth, and now I’m freaking out. Well – I’m quite a laid back person, so ‘freaking out’ for me consists more of sitting rigidly still and staring wide-eyed at the wall with a runny nose in some kind of [...]
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